how i'm feeling

That's right, I'm feeling sorry for myself so I'm going to do some illness posting.

I always knew I'd be out of it this week - last week I was busy for 4 days in a row, and I know this kind of thing can't last forever. Worth it to be around for the workshop & to be there through all of Now Play This, but on the final day I was very aware that my brain was soup and that I was into my reserves.

And it's hitting me now! Been pretty much just home since Sunday, and can definitely feel it - but I guess I should say what that means. I've been spending my day on the couch reclining. I've left the house - to go for a walk in the park or to go to the supermarket. But doing so leaves my head spinning and my chain of thought loopy. My legs feel weary when I approach the top of the stairs - this is something I measure my fatigue against, when I'm healthy they're fine. I've been working, but in the afternoon I find myself needing a nap - dragged off by weariness. Although, tbh, a nice nap in the early afternoon is I think a thing I want, fatigue-bound or not.

And this is still not bad enough to be a crash, just me taking it easy in the hopes of avoiding one. I've been able to work - I've dived into an exciting new feature for Downpour (video - but no promises as to when it might land), and really all I want to do is work on that. It's working in a fundamental way, I think, and now all I need to do is all of the rest of the owl. And also all the non-Downpour work I need to do, which does not have that new feature excitement but which does pay me in a much less speculative way. Last night I considered going back to Blue Prince (yet another sign of health, to have the brain spare for videogames), but I decided I wanted to code more Downpour. Which was foolish, and I knew it - and today I find myself dancing around a headache from thinking too much (this is why I don't play enough videogames).

More leaving the house tomorrow, so I hope I have recovered a bit over these past few days. My illness tracking band doesn't reckon so, mind... I'll take it easy, I promise!